Pregnancy Truths: Round 2

Check out Round 1 of my Pregnancy Truths.

It's safe to say I was blessed with 8 months of, perhaps the world's easiest pregnancy. Last weekend, however, I hit the 34-week mark and let me tell you- things are starting to get a tad uncomfortable. Here are some 3rd trimester pregnancy truths to make those of you in the same boat feel not-so-alone, and those of you who have yet to experience this take your birth control more seriously. Haha!

Pregnancy Truth #1:  
You might not love your baby.
Obviously, this is not an easy one for me to admit and I've received dozens of consoling, supportive comments from friends, family and co-workers that one day, in the not too distant future, it will all come naturally to me. I don't doubt their kind words, but if I'm being honest, pregnancy is a strange thing. It's unfamiliar and uncomfortable. And for someone like me who doesn't love kids, I genuinely have not yet developed feelings of love toward the little guy in my belly. I don't know if this makes me an anomoly, but I figure there have to be some other women who feel this way who are maybe too afraid of being deemed an unfit mom to come forward. So I'm saying it, while I pray for his health and wellbeing and anticipate all the wonderful memories we'll make with him, I don't yet love my baby.

Pregnancy Truth #2:
Your rear end will do unspeakable things.
I realize Truth #1 was a heavy way to start out, so on a lighter note, yeah- there's a lot going on down there. The other day Chuck and I had a conversation that went something like this,
Chuck: "I was thinking of coming in to cuddle and wake you up this morning. How would you have responded?"
Kaity: "Probably would have been annoyed that you woke me up. And then farted. Because apparently that's what I do now."
Chuck: "Aww...that's not tr-...well, yeah, it is."
Cue laughter.
Seriously though, constipation, hemorrhoids, gas- all par for the course,

Pregnancy Truth #3:
Grooming will take a backseat.
I sent my sister a text last week. It read: "Nobody warns you that it's impossible to shave your lady bits when you can't actually see your lady bits." My shower has seen me in some very compromising positions as of late.

Pregnancy Truth #4:
You might not be in the mood. 
As if it weren't enough that I am ungroomed, fat, and well, experiencing everything in Truth #2, any remaining hope of intimacy is pretty much dashed because there is literally nothing that sounds less appealing than adult time.
Did anyone else watch the season premiere of Snooki & JWoww (guilty pleasure alert)? I started cracking up when Jenni started talking about her "puffy butthole."

I feel ya, girl.